Monday, January 08, 2007

Apricot Kernel Milky

I'll admit to not being to hopeful on the chunkyness of this can, even whilst stood in the shop, but I did think that the design was slightly less off-putting than previous drinks. But I didn't want to start too strongly only to flag a couple of cans into my alloted amount, so Apricot Kernel Milky it was.


Purdy ain't it?

Opening it I could see the lack of chunks, it poured smoothly rather than plopped, there was no need to shake, hit, then attack the can with sharp utensils spraying lumps of jelly up the walls.



Just liquid, unless the jelly crud was of very low viscosity.

On tasting the chunkless liquid my first impression was that someone was desperate for a white russian, but lacking vodka had used Morissons own brand ameretto (probably named amorrisetto buy their highly imaginative marketing department). My next thought was that cyanide probably tastes like this.

I couldn't stop myself from sipping this, although a large portion of my brain told me too, it was car crash drinking at it's finest. If there was cyanide in it at least the milk would mean my bones would be that little bit stronger for the twenty seconds or so I had left.

wrong
:
1. No cyanide
2. No Milk

I can't begin to tell you how much I thought this was mostly milk, it tastes more like milk than UHT milk tastes of milk. That "y" is not some clever branding to make this more appealing to kids, it's there to stop them getting their arses sued.

Lacking chunks but could be good for supplying cyanide to the unsuspecting.

Chunkometer
Chunkage
Chewiness
Chokeability
Nausea